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Florida, United States

Wednesday, February 10, 2010



My name is Laurie and I'm a bitch.

I've discovered this over the last couple of days. I've always suspected, but now I know it as fact.

You want to know how I know this?

Well, I'm the new teacher's aide at my son's middle school. Yes. THE HORROR!

He's adjusting, as he doesn't have any other choice.

And apparently, the newbies get stuck with the bad kids. You know...the ones that scream profanities, destroy school property, break people's noses and let's not forget the worst of the bunch.....the ones that are consistently tardy or out of uniform....but that is a whole different issue.

Anyway, I'm in charge of those kids that make bad choices, at least for the next several weeks, but I have to say that I might have found my niche.

They are terrified of me. Seriously.

And all I had to do was give them the evil eye and scream at the top of my lungs a couple of times. It's pretty amazing, actually.

I already have a REPUTATION.

My son has the insider's view.

He's been hearing either, "Dude, your mom is hot!" or "Dude, your mom is such a BITCH!"

I'm just glad he's my son, because over the last several days, I've realized that I have pretty good kids.

So, thank you, God. You done me right in the whole procreation thing.


  1. Hahaha. I've been practicing the evil eye my mom used to give me every time I thought of doing something stupid.

    Glad to know you have found your niche :)


  2. Kids are too soft these days, they need to be yelled at. Good on you.
    And really, bitch and hot- where's the problem?

  3. I guess I need some tips, because I teach pre-k (4 and 5 year olds) and 1/2 of my kids don't listen to a word I say!

  4. There's nothing more sobering than having to take care of other people's kids.

  5. It has been an adventure!

    and it's proven to me that I've definitely gained self control over the last decade....