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Florida, United States

Monday, March 1, 2010

Dear Dumb Ass

Dear Mom of dumb ass student,

I apologize for ruining your day by phoning you and letting you know that your daughter has bladder issues and is unable to make it to her class on time.

I apologize for letting you know school policy so that you may talk with your daughter about taking more timely bathroom breaks.

I also apologize for the fact that the apple didn't even take a slight roll away from the family tree and fell in a rotten, gooey heap upon the algae, moldy infested roots of said tree.

I apologize for the fact that you're a complete dumb ass, waste of space and will most likely contribute an exact replica of yourself onto the good/tolerant graces of society.

I would also like to inform you that I'm very glad that I met you in my professional work space, because that made it your safe place, as I refrained from doing what I wanted to do, which was crawl through the phone and let you know all of the above and if you took issue, settle it the old fashioned way.


The dumb ass teacher you disrespected and left with a foul taste in her mouth.

Honestly....I'm amazed at the sheer stupidity of some so-called adults. This woman was actually pissed that her daughter's teacher took exception to the fact that she interrupted class by entering late, due to the fact that she had to pee.

This is especially galling, as not a teacher at our school would refuse the request to go to the bathroom. If the little twit would've at least went to class, explained that she was in dire need of the potty, she would've gotten a pass and then my work would not have been interrupted and I wouldn't now think that said girl is doomed to a life of crime, promiscuity and complete ignorance of the way the world works.

I actually had to send this girl to the principal, rather than have her stay in my class for the length of the on going lesson. The principal then had to deal with her dumb ass of a mother, and then turn the girl around to, HELLO????... spend the rest of the class period with me.

What a dumb ass. Seriously.


  1. Dear Dumb Ass Teacher,

    I just pissed myself. Could you come clean it up?


    Dumb Ass Parent

  2. LOL ~ I am thoroughly entertained by this posting. We have a slue of teachers in our family, and we laugh about this kind of ridiculousness on a regular basis... It's a shame, these children are our future...